Sammy Sosa's Playhouse

What Sammy Sosa Means to The Highly Heated Gamer

Written by The Highly Heated Gamer - June 18, 2019

I hate sports. The only people who play sports are Chads and Tyrones. I'd rather have a cork jammed in my urethra than play or watch a sports. Sensible people play video games instead, but the real smart people like me know that most video games are steaming piles of shit. One of the good ones is Sammy Sosa High Heat Baseball. I don't even know who the fuck Sammy Sosa is, but that is a good fucking game. Too bad it ruined my fucking life because I liked it so much that I kept looking for sports games that would be as good. But guess what? The rest of them suck monkey fuck!

Now these assholes in yellow sweaters pay me to write about these shitty games and I'd rather have a roid rage-d slugger give me a purple nurple. Now they want me to say what Sammy Sosa means to me? All I know about the cunt is that he played baseball. I've aslo heard he tries to be a white person or something. A lot of SJWs seem mad at him for it but I don't know, he seems kinda based if you ask me.